"Smile, You're in Spain!"

hi, friendlies! i miss you. so much has happened lately- i am hating this irregular internet access business. so, if you have a wireless laptop just laying around somewhere, be a champ and send it my way. that would be most helpful. i know its a long shot, but it cant hurt to ask...

want to know what ive been up to? here are some things i will hopefully be able to flesh out later when i get to have a REAL update (including pictures), but for now, here is the drive-by version:

- Seis Cafes con Leches will make you LOCO
- "El Rastro is just a bunch of b******t"- Chantal, Host Mom
- Death by Chocolate and Churros
- The Walk of Shame (documented in PICTURES!!)
- My Ever-Growing Portfolio of Star Wars Drawings
- Workin It on Metro Norte
- Sight-Seeing in Madrid
- Introducing: My Host Family

theres this ad that runs constantly on one of the tv stations here and ive been thinking about it all week. it says, "Smile, you're in Spain!"
i couldnt agree more.

i love this country, and i love you, and i wish you were here to share all this wonder with me. there is this warmth to Spain that penetrates everything and gives me a new kind of energy ive never had before. i think its that Mediterranean lifestyle; that joy and action and thirst for life. and yet....

Katie and i were talking about the time she spent in Russia on a mission trip, and how its so dark there in every sense of the word. you would never associate Spain with darkness. never. this place is positively overflowing with movement and color and sound and beauty.
and yet...

the darkness is still there, its just not as evident as it is in Russia. the people here live with a film covering their eyes; they are living, and living well, but not nearly as well as they could be if they knew the Author of life, the very Artist and Architect who crafted them, lovingly, tenderly, gracefully, purposefully. oh, that Katie and Denise and i would strive to push back the darkness in Spain, not in our power or for our namesakes, but for His and His alone.
amen.

Are You Listo/a for This?

probably not. here is a whirlwind of an update that will hopefully give you a taste of what ive been up to these last six days in what is quickly becoming my most favorite adventure of my life thus far. i advise you to take this in installments...

day uno:
i sit next to new friend Christopher on the plane. he is awesome and we drink Bailey´s and watch Flight of the Conchords together. the flight arrives around 9ish and i have no idea where Chantal (host mom) is, but eventually, thankfully, we are able to meet up and i am not lost forever in the abyss of the Madrid Barajas Airport. she is a French-Spanish woman and her 7 year old son, Félix, is with her. i meet Javier (the father), Chloé (age 11), and Victor (9) later. much more on them in another entry. we drive in their tiny car to their house in San Sebastián de los Reyes, about 30 minutes outside of Madrid and, incidentally, in the middle of nowhere. there is a sheep farm just off of our street. yes, sheep. the house is 3 stories tall, all the floors are marble, and my room is slightly reminiscent of a college dorm. the ceiling is slanted and, naturally, i hit my head several more times than i should have. the family leaves to go to some party in a nearby village that involves killing seven pigs, the last of which is done in with a bow and arrow. i am intrigued, but exhausted and not quite up for the bloodshed and 70+ people who will be there, so i elect to stay home and take in my new surroundings.

things learned today:
- Félix teaches me how to eat the nuts that have fallen from trees in the front yard
- there is the leg of some unidentified creature (lamb, i find out later) casually hanging out on the kitchen counter, which is totally normal in Spanish culture
- exhaustion and loneliness and fear and depression and culture shock and finding sweet encouraging notes your mother stuck in your suitcase will make you go through a momentary breakdown

the room

the house

the leg

day dos:

i venture outside and take a look around the neighborhood. La Granjilla, the subdivision, is a beautiful place with tree-lined streets, cobblestone sidewalks blanketed in moss, and ivy covered walls. there are mountains to the west; i can see them when i walk to the end of our street. i dont do much today except begin to realize, with both fear and exhiliration (that word keeps coming up again and again) that i am in Spain for the next 3 months. this is my new home.

things learned today:
- leek casserole is not that bad when youre hungry enough
- the leg of lamb that hangs out on the counter is actually delicious
- having to explain the English names for boy/girl body parts to young boys is ridiculously awkward (especially when their mother is present and urging you on insistently), but they will always think it is hilarious
- the Metro sounds like the most terrifying thing on the face of the Earth when it is not adequately explained

the neighborhood

the view

day tres:
this was a milestone of a day if i may say so myself. i ventured alone into Madrid via bus and then Metro with no specific aim in mind other than to take in the city with eager eyes. i ended up in El Parque del Buen Retiro, an incredibly gigantic and equally beautiful park that was once only open to Spanish royalty. im not sure how exactly big it is, but i was there for almost 3 hours and didnt even cover half of it. however, i was walking in circles most of the time looking for El Palacio del Crystal so that might have had something to do with it. i had such an enjoyable afternoon en el parque. the weather was idyllic, and it was the perfect place to sit, read, write, rest, appreciate. i felt as though my soul was giving one long exhale of content. you can rent rowboats to take on the lake, and someone across the water was offering up a playful melody on a saxophone. the sun was soaking into my clothes, the mood was peaceful, and i was feeling generally poetic when all of the sudden a man walked to a tree not 10 feet away from me, dropped trou, and started peeing. i laughed about this for a long time afterwards.

things learned today:
- the exact location of El Palacio del Crystal. also, the stacks of firewood inside are part of an art exhibit, and you will get in trouble if you are too close
- my Spanish is getting better but my English is quickly getting worse
- the Metro is one of my new favorite things and i dont ever want to drive a car again
- the way back home is a 20 minute walk along the side of a major highway and involves crawling under a fence (pictures to come at a later entry, dont worry)
-after 3 uncomfortable and somewhat awkward days in a strange city in a strange country with a strange family who speaks a strange language, a familiar voice will break you apart

the colonnade leading to the lake

El Palacio

grandeur

the lake and colonnade from the front

day cuatro:

Katie called me the night before- hallelujah! so we made plans to meet up today. these plans failed because at this point i had no cellphone and our buses are often late and Madrid is a huge city. it was a huge disappointment, but by now i am rather enjoying this new independence and freedom to go around Madrid doing whatever i want. i decided to visit El Templo de Debod, an Egyptian temple that was a gift to Spain (not quite sure how it got here, but regardless, i love it). its another gorgeous park ideal for people-watching, journaling, and enjoying life. i love watching the little old ladies here: they stroll around arm in arm with their friends wearing fancy fur coats, ambling about at their own pace like they own the city. its so funny. i met el profesor today, and we had our enlightening conversacion. later, i am supposed to meet up with Chantal at the kids´ school , but this proves to be impossible because she gives incredibly vague directions and the school has over 2,000 students enrolled. what a nightmare. i make the 20 minute walk of shame home in the dark and the freezing cold.

things learned today:

- ALWAYS take some kind of coat/jacket/body covering when you go out in Madrid- the mornings and evenings are ridiculously cold even if the day is perfect
- an MP3 player is a must for the Metro

- people in Madrid are incredibly helpful and kind when you need directions

- pondering the possible meanings and applications of "cutting the cord" is a worthwhile endeavor

Templo

Another view

day cinco:

FINALLY i am able to meet up with K&D. i love them and have missed them terribly and our reunion is awesome. i buy a cell phone, we have lunch and catch up, then we settle in at Dunkin Coffee for some Internet time. they play Justin Timberlake constantly there, which may be the main reason we go there so often. what a blessing to be with people who truly know and love me and have done life with me in America and now are doing life with me in Spain! i taught more this day than any other so far this week, and it went really well. Chloé and i watched High School Musical together as part of her English lesson. i never thought i would be so glad to see Zac Efrons girl face and ridiculous side bangs in my life. Chloé and i had a great time singing the songs and i am really enjoying getting to know her. more on each of the kids later.

things learned today:

- cauliflower mashed with cheese and ham tastes AWESOME and i am loving the food here

- Heath Ledger died?!?!

- walking everywhere all the time + the wonderment of being in Spain + jet lag = exhausted body but racing mind that makes it impossible to sleep at night

- 5 days of only trying to speak Spanish means broken English with strange accents
- you can see someone get pickpocketed before your very eyes and still not be exactly sure of what you saw

- if you hang around in the Metro long enough you will get to hear whatever kind of music you want becuase of the variety of musicians there- violin, accordian, tribal drumming, pop, accoustic... did i mention that i LOVE the Metro?

accordian man on the Metro

thanks for the Internet and regular dose of Justin, Dunkin Coffee

day seis:

another beautiful day in Spain. the weather this week has truly been perfect. i really do love it here- i wake up whenever i choose and then take a bus to one of the liveliest and most culturally rich cities in the world? is this really my life?? thank You, Jesus. today i felt very convicted about being swept away in all the adventure and romance of this new life in Spain and forgetting to love my host family like Christ. however, there were so many random opportunities to share the love and grace of Christ today i was stunned and grateful at how easily the Lord the moves when He chooses. Félix and i talked about the sunset and who made it: "God," he said. "Yes, and Jesus," i added. "No," he retorted, "Jesus wasnt there when the world was made." i tried to explain a little more, but seeing as how Félix can sometimes be a terror and i didnt feel like debating the theology of the Trinity with a 7 year old, that conversation was over. but Chloé asked me randomly what i believe about religion and that led to a short conversation before dinner. i am praying fervently for more opportunities to share the Gospel, only occasionally in words.

things learned today:

- fresh bread is delivered daily to the house and hung on the outside gate

- nudity (on tv, in advertisements, in super raunchy magazine stands on the streets) is not a big deal here

- academics:Spain as beauty pageants:America. the kids are studying and going to school NONSTOP

- in Spain it is rude to sit at the dinner table and not eat with both hands in plain sight

- this is not my adventure, but merely a story written long ago that i was invited to play a small part in

señoritas after lunch in front of D´s orange vespa

day siete (today):

today was really just a laid back day of figuring out budgets (Denise, you are a monetary and mathematical genius), setting routines, and eating delicious toast and coffee in the cutest cafe for 2 euros. things are starting to become more familiar, but still, every now and then we just start grinning like idiots at each other, and we all know what it means without speaking: "Seriously?? Are we really in Spain?"

i love it here.

i love it.

i.love.it.

i. l.o.v.e. i.t.

get it?

things learned today:

- ugh. i dont have very much money.

- ugh. bus and Metro tickets are expensive and February needs to get here so i can use an abono pass (unlimited monthly ticket for all forms of transportation)

- Mom will be here next weekend!!

- the Del Prado and Reína Sofia (world-famous art museums) are free on Sundays from 9-2

- Madrid (especially the Cibeles, Castellana, Gran Víá area) is breathtaking at night

the symbol of Madrid- the bear and the madroño (strawberry tree)

notice how i am in complete anti-pickpocket mode with my purse and not at all in fun-touristy-picture taking mode. oh well.

Katie and i getting lost somewhere by Sol

beautiful Madrid

its 4AM here. good night... morning. i love you.

I'm not dead! I'm alive! And I'm in Spain!

¡hola amigos!

well, im here. today is day 6 and i am loving Spain so far. there is so much to tell you... but i dont think now is the time. im in an internet cafe (a Dunkin Coffee... as opposed to Dunkin Donuts), and i only have an hour. trust me, that is not enough time to give you a proper update. also, i am not able to upload pictures, and pictures are a necessity in global storytime. soon, i promise.

Spain is a vibrant country, full of life and beauty and energy. the people here are wonderful- helpful, kind, gracious, passionate. i am enjoying this immensely, especially now that i have met up with Katie and Denise. those first four days alone were definitely interesting, and necessary, i might add. i feel like a different person.

mini-story/something to ponder: Tuesday i met a man in the park at El Templo de Debod (google it, its beautiful) and we had a good 15 minute long chat in broken English and Spanish, which is always entertaining. he asked me what i was doing in Spain; i told him i wasnt really sure yet, but i had a few ideas. it turns out he is a psychology professor at a nearby university. we talked about psychology for a while and how i might want to be a counselor someday.
he told me that sometimes people travel away from home to escape from their family, and in doing so, eliminate mental illness. he made some kind of cutting motion, like he was using scissors, and said, "Umbilical." he asked me what i was trying to cut ties with. i told him my thoughts, and he understood. that idea has been on my mind the last few days, and i think el profesor de psicología was on to something. i already feel like things are different in the best way possible, like i am different. i like that, and i am so glad to be here.

thank you, for helping me get here. and thank You, Lord, for the wonders these eyes have seen in this handful of days so far.

te amo.

Take a deep breath and jump on in...

it is so surreal to know you are on the eve of something life changing.

to know that i am about to embark on something great and different, and from here on out, i will not (cannot) be the same person i was before. maybe thats a little dramatic, but i think there is a lot of truth to that thought.

this week ive felt like ive been teetering on the edge of some great precipice, looking down and feeling dizzy with exhiliration and vertigo.

i can choose: fall with desperation, grasping at nothingness with flailing arms, or jump willingly, relishing the breathlessness and the whip of the wind.

you better believe im jumping.

Update

hello all! we are t minus 11 days from departure, and the nerves are definitely kicking in. Denise and Katie, two of my best friends who are also going on this adventure, have been feeling them too.
what do we have to be afraid of? yes, this is a drastic new change, and uncertainty, loneliness, and discomfort are sure to arise, but it seems the Lord has been in this from the very beginning, making this process go as smoothly as possible and directing our steps at every moment. thank You.

i have some very interesting information to share in light of a conversation that crossed numerous time zones yesterday. my new friend Tep (Stephanie) has lived in Madrid for the past few years and is the director of SyncroNations, a culture and language exchange that focuses on building relationships between Spanish university students and young Americans studying or traveling abroad in Spain.
through sports, intercambios (language exchange), attending classes together, and hanging out on campus and around the city, SyncroNations hopes to build authentic, agenda-less relationships through which the love and beauty of Christ can be communicated in a genuine way. i am incredibly excited to find out more about what the Lord is doing with this group and look forward to being a part of it very soon.

here are some things i learned from my convo with Tep:

• less than 1/2 of 1% of Spaniards are evangelical Christians
• Spain is traditionally Catholic, but most Spaniards will clarify their beliefs by saying "I'm Catholic but I don't believe in God."
• realistically, most Spaniards are either agnostic or atheist
• spirituality is an incredibly personal and taboo subject in Spain: asking someone about their beliefs is similar to approaching a stranger in the States and inquiring about their sex life
• Spaniards have a general apathy toward God; there is no perceived need for Him and they do not see how Jesus Christ could possibly be relevant to them
• many view evangelicals as a cult
• there is a general distrust of organizations, particularly of the Church, which has had a very dark and twisted history in Spain

Tep said, however, that as spiritually dead as Spain might be, the fingerprints of the Lord are not easily ignored: in their passion and joy for life, in their very deep and loyal friendships, the people of Spain unknowingly give evidence of the very Creator they feel has no relevance to them.

listening to Tep describe the spiritual state of Spain and the desperate hearts that have been numbed by apathy was an eye-opening experience that gave me a new perspective on this trip. my friends and i might be the first Gospel-believing Christians our host families and university friends have ever met. what a heavy, blessed thing- to be gifted with the responsibility of introducing people to the embodiment of grace and beauty and love and justice.

after living in the Bible-Belt for the past 22 years where church is a hobby and most subscribe to a watered-down Gospel and wimpy Jesus this is not an idea that is easy to wrap my mind around.

with a new understanding of the weight of this responsibility i am going to be on my knees much, much more. i beg that you do the same. thank you.